Maybe Especially Then

I’ve been running my podcast for a couple of months now. Lately, I’ve started to pull back. Not because I don’t enjoy it, but because I’ve been losing energy. At first, I loved making characters and voicing them. That creative spark still lives in me. But the truth is, a big part of why I create is to make people laugh, to spark conversations, to connect. And right now, the podcast isn’t really gaining traction.

I’m not quitting. Not even close. But until I have a steady stream of listeners, I’m doing it when I want, not because I feel like I have to keep up with a schedule.

Recently, someone left a comment on my Instagram that stung. They said the reason I don’t have followers is because in one of my videos I “looked unkempt” as a person with ADHD. That hit me hard. Because sure, there are ADHD creators who are polished and put together. But almost no one shows the other side.

Sorry, not sorry. My content isn’t meant for people who want the shiny version of me. It’s meant to be real. If that’s “too messy” for some, they don’t have to follow. I’d rather people follow me for who I am and what I bring to their lives than for a curated, picture-perfect version that was never mine to begin with.

The truth is, ADHD isn’t rainbows and unicorn farts. It’s executive dysfunction. It’s staring at too many tasks and not having enough energy to tackle any of them. It’s messy. And while I could play the perfectionist game on social media, that’s not the story I want to tell.

So maybe this is just a reminder: be kind to yourself, even when the world isn’t kind to you.

Maybe especially then.